Have you ever seen $20 crumpled up like this? The woman asked her spouse.
“No,” her spouse said.
She smiled at him sensuously for a long moment before carefully undoing the blouse’s top four buttons. She took out a crumpled twenty dollar bill after carefully reaching down into the cleavage made by a silky, smooth push-up bra.
He grinned approvingly as he accepted the crumpled $20 bill from her.
Then she asked her husband, “Have you ever seen fifty dollars all crumpled up …?”
He said to her, his voice a little nervous, “Uh… no, I haven’t.”
She pulled up her skirt, gave him another seductive little smile, and withdrew a crumpled fifty dollar note in a seductive manner.
He began to breathe a little more rapidly in anticipation as he accepted the crumpled fifty dollar bill.
“Now, have you ever seen fifty thousand dollars crumpled up?” she asked.
“There’s no way,” he said, growing even more panting.
“Well, check out the garage!” She answered.
I couldn’t find my keys after a meeting a few days ago. I immediately gave myself a “TSA pat down.”
I didn’t have them in my pockets. I must have left them in the car, I realized abruptly.
I made a mad dash for the parking lot.
I’ve had numerous reprimands from my spouse for leaving my keys in the ignition of the car.
He worries that someone might steal the automobile.
He was correct, I realized as I scanned the parking lot. There was nobody in the parking lot.
I phoned the cops right away.
I told them where I was and admitted that the car had been taken and that I had left my keys inside.
Then I gave my husband the hardest call of all:
“My car was stolen, and I left my keys inside.”
There was silence for a while. When I heard his voice, I assumed the call had been dropped.
“Are you serious?” “I dropped you off!” he yelled.
Now it was my turn to be silent. Embarrassed, I said, “Well, can you come and get me?”
He retorted, “I will, as soon as I convince this cop that I didn’t steal your car!”
Welcome to the golden years…
One night, a wife found her husband standing next to their baby’s crib. She watched him quietly.
As he stood looking down at the sleeping infant, she saw on his face a mixture of emotions: disbelief, doubt, delight, amazement, enchantment, even skepticism.
Touched by this unusual display and the deep emotions it aroused, with eyes glistening, she slipped her arm around her husband and asked, “What happened?”
It’s amazing!” he replied. “I just can’t figure how anybody can make a crib like that for only $67.50!”